Back in the day...

I'm way too young to have a "back in the day." Well at least I think I am. That's old people speak and totally not, like, cool for one of today's hip and where-it's-at youth. I'm 23, that's pretty young. It isn't really skip home room, learn to drive, make-out behind the bleechers young, but I'm still way too immature, energetic, and naive to be aged.

And yet I had a moment, a "back in the day" moment.

Back in the day, gas was only $1 a gallon. And movies were $5 for an evening showing. Traffic jams only occurred within 5 miles of a downtown metropolis or because of a traffic accident. It is depressing.

And it's all because I've been spoiled. My rent is ridiculously cheap, especially for the prime location just off the main street in downtown Madison, with a view of the lake off the front porch (if you angle yourself properly). Now I have to move to the twin cities area where I don't have connections and live off my wits and strengths alone.

This thought comes to mind: The difference between beautiful fireworks and a hideous, fiery explosion is the distance from the blast.

Oh, not to mention the joy my fortune cookie gave me the other day. And I quote, "Any day above ground is a good day."

... are you serious?!? Not only is that discriminating against miners, but possibly the worst fortune ever. And it isn't even a fortune, in that it does not suggest or hint at some future event. They could have saved ink and just put "at least you're not dead." Or as I prefer, you could be on fire.

Sure things are bad, but you could be on fire. If you're dead, at least your corpse isn't being reduced to some hideous, wretched, smoldering pile. If you're shot in the stomach, have a paper cut, just got dumped or fired, found out you have lupis (sidenote: I don't really know what lupis is), or anything else; it'd be worse if you were also on fire. If you're on fire... you could be on more fire.

See what this fortune cookie has done. I've become cynical... err, more cynical, and morose. I wanted to write something here about girls that have gone and will go wild or about the most successful snipets of stand-up I've had. For now though, at least I'm not on fire. I'll get to the rest later.